Rome, Days 1 and 2

On Wednesday afternoon, Paige and I left for a much-needed (particularly for her, given the recently announced KU budgetary disaster) vacation to Italy. Our flight from Kansas City to Chicago was delayed for close to two hours because it was sprinkling at O'Hare, so our layover evaporated and we literally got off the plane at C1, walked quickly to C21, and boarded our flight to Rome. Our apartment is centrally located, just a couple hundred yards from the Pantheon on a very quiet side street. If you have plans to visit any time soon, let me know and I will hook you up with Carola.

Paige crashed for about an hour and a half after we arrived, and I used the time to walk around and get my bearings for a bit. Then, we headed out for the "Ancient Rome" part of town. The stretch of Rome that includes the Roman Forum, Palatine Hill, and the Colosseum is fascinating for two reasons: first, because of what the stuff is and second, because the Roman Forum and Palatine Hill areas in particular essentially represent tourism-based-on-imagination. To bring this closer to home, imagine yourself walking from the White House to the Lincoln Memorial and then across the National Mall to the Capitol Building, passing the National Gallery, the Smithsonian, etc., en route. Now imagine thousands of tourists thronging to that area to see quarter structures (if that), random bits of columns and concrete remnants, and signs indicating what used to be there and what used to happen there. Undeniably, it is cool to see a portion of Caligula's palace, the grassy spot where the House of the Vestal Virgins used to stand, and a few scattered remnants of the Temple of Julius Caesar. And really, I guess a lot of European tourism is at least somewhat comparable. It just struck me as particularly brilliant that in the case of this part of Rome, there's just not a lot left ... and yet people come to see "it" in droves.

The Colosseum requires a bit less imagination. The reconstructed floor on the right side of the picture below would've been covered with sand and extended across the entire base of the arena, with ancient elevators carrying gladiators, animals, and unlucky "participants" up from the holding areas below (which you can also see in the picture, although it requires some imagination from that angle). The various parties then carried on to the amusement of the emperor, various dignitaries, and 50,000 other well-wishers. While we were there I couldn't help thinking about having a time machine (my fantasy of fantasies, as some of you know), loading up a few dozen of the high school girls taking duck face selfies overlooking the arena, and seeing what 1st century Romans would think about that.

All in all, this particular part of Rome is extremely interesting if for no other reason (and there are plenty of other reasons) than providing one with perspective. When Paul and Peter were imprisoned here, there were more than a million people living in the city. I'll let that sink in. Talk about the Center of the Universe. There was no other city in the world with more than a million residents until London and Paris in the 19th century. And then after the Fall, the population supposedly fell to a low of about 20,000 during the Middle Ages. For the Texans in the crowd, that's basically like Austin turning into Brenham.

On Day 2 we went to St. Peter's Basilica and the Vatican Museum. We got to St. Peter's a little after 7 a.m. and there were only a couple hundred people in the entire place. So that was pretty fabulous.  The construction of St. Peter's took 120 years (not unlike the restoration of I-35 between Austin and Dallas) and the funding of the project (St. Peter's, not I-35), was sort of what pushed Martin Luther over the edge. As a good Protestant, I get that. However, one does have to give the Catholics credit for putting together a heck of a church. I can't say that I like it any more than some of the other cathedrals we've seen in Europe, but it does seem to have a bit more gravitas.

After finishing up at St. Peter's we headed around the corner to the Vatican Museum, a.k.a. the single most crowded place on the planet. I had bought advance reservations, as always, for a timed entry at the opening bell, and that basically let us skip to the front of the line. But once inside, it still was completely ridiculous. I honestly cannot imagine how it would be an hour or two after opening. We battled and jostled and used our best Indy car driver moves and saw all manner of old and cool stuff that legions of Popes and their minions have preserved for posterity (including an ancient Greek statue of a young boy very ill-prepared to fight in World War II, pictured below), and ultimately made it to the Sistine Chapel. As much as I hate to say it, the Sistine Chapel was underwhelming. Yes, Michelangelo's work is amazing and I find The Last Judgment (with Muscular Jesus as Judge) even more impressive than the Creation of Adam centerpiece. But until arriving at the Vatican Museum, I wasn't aware that "Sistine" is Latin for "put on a straitjacket and glance at some amazing art before they make you leave." You seriously only get like 45 seconds in the room until they open the rear cattle chute and force you out. So my personal recommendation is that if you (1) are into Michelangelo and (2) want to see the Sistine Chapel properly, you should (1) go to Florence and see David (which you may stand and look at from all angles, all day long) and (2) skip the Vatican Museum and buy a really nice book on the Sistine Chapel.

When we escaped the Vatican Museum and saw the masses forming to enter St. Peter's, we congratulated ourselves (again) on having been there a few minutes after the doors opened. We then headed back to St. Peter's Square and decided to trek back to the apartment for a bit. As we were leaving the Square, Paige passed by a vendor's table, did a double-take at these little round discs like clear Skoal canisters with pictures of Pope John Paul and Pope Francis on them, and said "Hey look ... they're selling red Pope jelly beans." Ummm ... try rosary beads.

In addition to all of the cool stuff mentioned above, I've also developed the following insights in our two days in the city: (1) Rome pizza is nowhere near as good as Florence pizza; (2) Roman men dress better than American men (although that isn't a particularly high bar these days); (3) Rome's traffic and the ingenuity of its drivers rivals that of Istanbul; and (4) Rome's labyrinthine alleys and corridors often leave Google Maps crying in a corner. I've also been amazed by Rome's street vendor market. We went to Sea World 17-18 years ago in the middle of summer. I do not recommend doing this. Those of you who have been to Sea World in San Antonio know that it is approximately 97% asphalt and there is no shade anywhere. Practically every family we saw had a 1-to-4 year-old child who was crying / screaming / not really having a good time at all. I thought this was sort of interesting, given that the only reason a moderately sane adult would ever go to Sea World (particularly when it is 112 degrees) would be so that "the kids could have a good time." Anyway, while we were there I commented that if we quit our jobs and convinced park administrators to let us open a kiosk selling kid-sized shirts that read "I Was a Pain in the Ass at Sea World," we would be able to retire in no time. Having been in Rome for two days now, I believe a similar strategy would work if one were to sell adult-sized t-shirts with a picture of the Colosseum captioned "Veni, Vidi, I Got Asked If I Wanted to Buy Water or Selfie Sticks."

But I digress.

As our second day transitioned into afternoon, I started writing this while Paige crashed for a bit. We then headed out for a very late lunch / early dinner and to see four of the churches that are in the general area of the Pantheon (which we still haven't visited). We made it to two of them and will hit the others tomorrow or the next day. One of the churches -- the Church of San Luigi Dei Francesi -- has three panels by Caravaggio. The other -- Gesu Church -- is, I believe, the very first Jesuit church (fun fact: Pope Francis is a Jesuit). It has some cool artwork and the following sign-of-the-day:

And with that, I will close. I've no clue what the next few days will bring, but will provide updates when I can.

Cheers,
Mike